It’s been a while..
since I’ve actually vented and blogged my inside thoughts. They’re inside thoughts for a reason right? I use to have no problem showing people that I had emotions or feelings. But why does seem to me now, that if I show any sign of emotion, I feel like I’m putting myself in a vulnerable position?
Why? I don’t want people to see me as weak.. to the extent where they can just take advantage of me. I try to portray myself as someone with a rigid exterior.. because deep down I’m soft.. because I’m afraid.. afraid that someone might come along and jab me at my insides and tear my fucking heart out. Emo much? Yeah.
What’s even worse is I’ve tried to bottle up every single emotion I affiliated with negativity because I wanted to prove to everyone that I’m not some fucking push over.. and instead these emotions are just poison to my insides. They’re slowly deteriorating my state of mind.. I’ve lost it.
Words of Wisdom
Some people get into relationships just to pass time. To fill a void. To ignore responsibilities. To satisfy loneliness. And then they throw around the word ‘love’ to lie to themselves that they’re not in it for such reasons.
(Source: dreamongood)
